The Bane Of My Existence.

Headphones.

They are out to get me. I shit you not.

I just look at them and they tangle. iPod, mobile phone, computer... doesn't matter what they are attached to, they instantly become a mess of cords the minute I am within 10m of them. In fact, I think they plot against me and take part in 'Operation: Mega-Tangle' just me to piss me off.

They get caught on everything in my bag, and get caught on the bag itself when I am taking them out for use. They get caught on my jacket, in my scarf, on seats, railings, plants, the treadmill... It is just ridiculous the amount of untangling I have to do on a daily basis. I am pretty sure it takes up at least 5 hours of my day.

Maybe they don't really mean it. Maybe they are just a pawn in Technology's evil game to kill me (through sheer frustration).

So, as I am doomed to be in an eternal struggle with headphones, I went and bought hot pink ones, so I have something pretty to look at...

... while wanting to rip them apart, stab them with a fork, drown them in water, bury them in wet cement, and run them over with a steam-roller*.

*Wow.. I am getting violent in my old age. Should maybe see someone about that..

OCD Tendencies (Vol 3) - Eating.

So, I may have mentioned before that as the years pass but I miraculously manage to stay the same age (insert snort of disbelief here), I notice more and more obsessive compulsive behaviour. No.3 on the list involves eating food.

(If you read the post about me counting and sorting mixed nuts, you may know where this is headed...)

I like to eat bits of food in pairs (or any multiple of two really). For example, I have to have 2 or 4 bits of pasta on my fork. Also, I have to eat even numbers of olives. I will try to offload the extra one to someone else. Once, I even put an extra olive back into the salad bowl.. at a restaurant. True story.

And yes, I have counted peas before.

I don't know how or why this behaviour started... Although, I first remember doing it with fries. Oh, and FYI, the fries have to be of similar length otherwise I won't eat them. Halves of a piece of food are ok, given that I eat both halves - like with a boiled egg or cherry tomato that has been cut in half.

Obviously, this isn't the case when eating a piece of steak, or fish, or a slice of pizza. I mean, come on, I am not that crazy*.





*Obviously I need to eat an even number of pizza slices.

Nuts.

Hand me the straight jacket. I am going nuts...

Today I bought a packet of mixed nuts, tipped them onto a plate, separated them and counted how many there were of each type.

Peanuts: 56
Almonds: 44
Hazelnuts: 32
Cashews: 24
Pecans: 18
Walnuts: 12
Brazil Nuts: 6

Lucky there were even numbers of each. Otherwise there could have been* (mental) issues for me.

Tomorrow, I may or may not divide them up daily portions. You know, just before the straight jacket gets buckled up.



* Lol... 'Could have been....' I suspect they already exist.

Toilet Humour.

I often wonder why toilet humour is so funny*... and yet, cleaning a toilet is not. Hmmmm.

This may or may not have something to do with the fact that it is cleaning day. Toilets are gross. Public toilets are even worse, but lets not go there. We would all end up needing therapy.

Give me a poo or fart joke any day, though :-) Or a whoopee cushion. Well, maybe not a whoopee cushion... I already have 3. I used to have a CD of 100+ fart sound effects which would have me on the floor in hysterics every time. But alas, that CD was lent out and never to be seen again *cries*. The funny thing is, is that mum wants me to find another CD... So apparently, the apple doesn't fart far from the tree. I mean fall, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.



*Well, funny to me. Pull my finger.

Sinner.

Like Fiona Apple sings in 'Criminal', I've been a bad, bad, girl...

Forgive me Blog, for I have sinned. It has been weeks since my last blog and I feel bad... Too many, shall we say, 'distractions' elsewhere... But I promise to be a good girl from now on. I don't want to be sent to the naughty corner... (well, not alone at least).

There is a lot more that I can bore you with, so will get onto it asap. After I log off from Twitter. And sign out of msn. And stop dressing as trailer trash (oh yeah... bet you can't wait for that blog).

Weekly Shoe Update..

A Week In The Life Of My Feet...

Shoe selection from last week...